You've carved yourself a part in the world as a voyeur... a hermit, a lover when you feel like it.

You know how long it took to get all the evil exes' contact information so I could form this stupid league?

You know that Eve was an adulterer, even though she may deny it, and you know that her lover, Carlos, blackmailed her for cash, and when Carlos Ruiz went back to Eve to ask for more money,

These are Kelly Goodman's bank statements over the last year. Oh. And that is a wire transfer for over 900 grand she received five months ago from the estate of her last boyfriend.

And yet, on this bright, sunny Boston afternoon, a talking teddy bear is about to marry his girlfriend, proving two things:

The answers are... yes, definitely, and no, but my boyfriend is.

Not often a dude ruins your face... skull-stomps your sanity, grabs your future baby mama... and personally sees to four of your five shittiest moments.

At one point, I even tried to break up with my girlfriend because trying to take into account her preferences as well as my own and then find perfect solutions -- (Laughter) was just leaving me exhausted.

Losing your manboobs, so you can hook up with somebody, now that's motivation. (Laughter) So, I want to know: What do you want?

My soul is always soothed by the giant live oak trees, shading lovers, drunks and dreamers for hundreds of years, and I trust a city that always makes way for music.

But now we want our partner to still give us all these things, but in addition I want you to be my best friend and my trusted confidant and my passionate lover to boot, and we live twice as long.

And they have one home associated with their parents, but another associated with their partners, a third connected maybe with the place where they happen to be, a fourth connected with the place they dream of being, and many more besides.

(Beatboxing: "Billie Jean") ♫ Billie Jean is not my lover ♫ ♫ She's just a girl who claims that I am the one ♫ ♫ But the kid is not my son ♫ (Applause) All right.

My mother died, a relationship I'd been in ended, I moved back to the United States from some years abroad, and I got through all of those experiences intact.

I wasn't even going to mention this, but somebody told me that Meg Ryan might be here, and she is the world's most famous female copulatory vocalizer.

"The Great Gatsby" spends the last four in the morning of his life waiting for a lover who never shows, and the most famous wake-up in literature, perhaps, "The Metamorphosis."

And famously, you may remember that out on the campaign trail for war, he wrote to his lover, Empress Josephine, saying, "Don't wash. I'm coming home."

So a note for a dating tip here, in some cultures, if you want to please your lover, you call them and hang up. (Laughter) So why do people leave missed calls?

We have a romantic ideal in which we turn to one person to fulfill an endless list of needs: to be my greatest lover, my best friend, the best parent, my trusted confidant, my emotional companion, my intellectual equal.

And your love for your partner may be in its own dynamic relationship, healthy or totally weird, with the love of your parents and siblings.

Lovers support each other in discovering themselves, reaching beyond themselves, and enriching their lives and the world together.

And please raise your hand if you've ever used Tinder to help you find a mate.

(Laughter) You may have wondered, consciously or not, if I have diabetes, or a partner, or if I eat carbs after 7pm.

Now in this movie, that his client had written, Leo would play an oil industry lobbyist whose girlfriend, a local meteorologist, threatens to leave him because his work contributes to global warming.

I sell dreams, and I peddle love to millions of people back home in India who assume that I'm the best lover in the world.

It found me then because of two things: a very close friend, young guy, my age, died of pancreatic cancer unexpectedly, and then my girlfriend, who I thought I was going to marry, walked out.

The play opens with young Hermia raging at her father Egeus and Theseus, the King of Athens, who have forbidden her to marry her lover Lysander.

At this point, the woods are getting crowded, as the lovers are sharing the space with a group of “rude mechanicals”— a troupe of workers drunkenly rehearsing a play, led by the jovial Nick Bottom.

Called crazy or drama or too much drinking, his actions weren't understood to be what they really were, which was clear signs of danger.

Isolation creeps in when your new boyfriend or girlfriend starts pulling you away from your friends and family, your support system, and tethering you more tightly to them.

Scribbling by night under the watchful eyes of his lover Padma, Saleem’s frame narrative echoes that of "1001 Nights, " where a woman named Scheherazade tells her king a series of stories to keep herself alive.

I know I look amazing, thank you. (Laughter) I am forty-five years old and I have never once unselfconsciously held hands with a lover in public.

I don't know how many of you can even imagine what that might be like because, of course, it's a small thing, isn't it, holding hands with a lover in public?

Start by being a better friend, a better parent, a better child to your parents; a better sibling, a better lover, a better partner.

For example, we know from studies of heartbroken people that having a clear understanding of why the relationship ended is really important for our ability to move on.